i had it in my head forever that i wanted to try out short hair. i love it on other women. like love it a lot. it's fun and different and edgy. so when we moved to california and two adorable friends of mine were sporting pixie cuts, i was given that extra motivation to go for it.
i've always said that hair shouldn't define girls. it becomes a security blanket. hey, if you just plain love long hair, i think that's great. seriously, to each her own. i just wanted to see what would happen, how i would feel, without something that was starting to define me. everyone had an opinion. it was kinda funny to hear people talk me into it or out of it. i went back and forth for about a month. did i really want to do it? i knew in the back of my mind that i'd hate it. but i wanted to show myself that i could live just fine without it. stubborn, right? um yeah.
on april 15 at 9am i headed to the salon. before i left i mentioned to mark that i was nervous all the sudden. he, who was always supportive of me chopping off my hair, said, "just remember, you'll always be beautiful no matter what cut you end up with." thank you dear husband.
i went to a chick who cut the hair of my friend with the cute pixie. and about an hour later my hair was gone. i drew a crowd of other stylists who couldn't believe i was going for it. ha! i walked out of the salon loving my new hair. i was happy and smiling and thinking that i totally did the right thing. mark and the kids were super nice and kept telling me how much they liked it. i felt awesome.
and then i woke up the next morning.
i cried. and i hate admitting that. it's freaking hair. i was so upset with myself. i felt terrible and totally bought into the idea that i was no longer "cute." holy cow, looking back on that day, i feel like a dork. i was upset over nothing.
my feelings changed day to day for a while. hated it and then loved it. totally confident and then completely weak. it took about two months before i was 100% okay with it every day. i was happy with it consistently.
reactions from people, who i knew and didn't know, were quite entertaining. one evening i went to the movie theater to meet some friends to see pitch perfect 2. i was the first one there and was waiting by the ticket counter for my friends to arrive. there was a dude, probably mid 40s, who kept looking at me and smiling. creepy, right? haha. and then he walked up to me. oh crap. but he very nicely said, "i just have to tell you that i love your hair. it's cool when women have confidence to pull that off. you look great." that was very cool of him. to be honest, i got more compliments from men specifically about my hair cut than women. dudes are supposed to love long hair. weird.
anyway, here's the point. i finally learned real confidence and owning who i was. and to be clear, i've always been a confident person but this took me to a whole new level. sad it took a hair cut for me to grow that way but whatever. i learned and that's the point. i'm glad i did it. who knows, maybe i'll chop it again someday. mark says that i should do a pixie with platinum blond hair. haha. i'm not sure i'll go that far.
|still in the salon parking lot. shocked but happy.|
|a few days later. not as happy.|
|when i started to really really love it.|
|first time i tried to add curl.|
|slight mullet phase.|
|and how it is now.|
|i usually pin up the back because it's kinda at an awkward length. i've had quite a few people see me like this and say "you shaved the sides. i love it!" haha. they are kinda disappointed when i show them it's just pinned up.|